Movies, books, stories that have a good bad guy have always done so well in box offices and on the New York best seller list. Heath Ledgers’ performance on the Dark Knight is one of my ultimate favorite villain performances of all time…well, after Balthazar from Despicable Me 3 of course…the ultimate masters of not giving a shit. I wonder if it is any reflection of our ability to relate and recognize our very own darkness… that has settled quietly for now…hidden in the depths of our souls…waiting for the perfect excuse to implode. Yes, the Christian in us tries to keep this dark side under wraps…under the beautiful silky sheets….under the covers that perfectly disguise…where no one or very few people should ever know. Most of us are obsessed with proving our goodness and chaste hearts for there is always a great reward promised for the angelic. That alone shines such a dark selfishness where our actions are led by a promise of a heaven and an acknowledgement by the saints and not by a sheer longing to shine our light with no expected honor in sight. Darkness has always been associated with failure and shame so no one will ever claim it ever so proudly. It is an energy that we almost have to fight against all our lives. Nobody wants to accept they have darkness in them, but its not possible to have a light without the dark. They need each other to coexist for darkness is the absence of light and only self awareness reveals the true presence of the other in you. Knowing thy darkest side is also revealing your brightest light. This dark side doesn’t necessarily have to be extreme…it is as normal as the air we breathe. If you have ever been consumed by rage and felt like punching the daylights out of someone…or by poisonous jealousy fueled by self hatred and insecurity…or self destructive pain that longs to feel within an empty vessel that has lost hope to the meaning of life…or if you have gloated over someone else’s pain and misery to nurse your own wounds of imperfection, the list is endless…that is a dark side…and yours alone.
Seems society advocates for people to hide the dark and bring out the light first instead but I believe a lot of problems emanate from that self righteous chasing act. Deep down we know we are faking it and trying too hard and sooner or later we will show the real side through impulsive actions, in the vile words we speak in anger, which we can also mask prudently as “mistakes”. How about trying the opposite stance…allow the darkness to envelope us so that the only thing left to do is bring out our light… following the path of least resistance. I can bet the only thing that will be left will be light when real… raw… hardcore darkness unraveling is allowed . There will be no constant battles to look right, no conflict within causing all sorts of eruptions and disruptions in our lives. There will be freedom of being…of just being. I may sound like a little evil witch suggesting this but there is a great deal of pain that comes from hiding these parts of ourselves…we are both dark and light. If it were common for people to show their flaws, thoughts and demons freely, then they will be judged less and we normalize imperfection. Our greatest suffering in the human condition comes from judging ourselves and others for the parts of us that are less acceptable in society. The more we hide the dark, the darker it becomes…the monster ravenously feeds on an unreleased pit of stress within, leaving a string of powerful toxic potential energy waiting to explode. There is freedom in flaws…a what if flow…where no answers have been found yet, open for discovery and correction. Where what’s really there is left to be exactly what it is. That truth…just lying there… for all to witness and see.
Now…coming back to earth… the above is obviously difficult for most to attain or even start to practice without adverse reactions from society. It only works when everyone is on the same page. Please don’t go about cursing people out out loud and then blame me for an ass whooping. Maybe….just maybe…one way is to look for a way for a release of these energies in a healthy way…creatively. There is a reason why passion and talent is usually connected with originality and creation of the new because it only comes from a source that only you can feel hidden within. Most people can forgive a raunchy dance move…damning songs, weird designs of cloth …structures… architecture…the weirder the better for it is all a longing to defy…comedy and tasteless roasts…explicit poetry …free flow unbound writing. Many can be forgiven for violent sport…an alter ego creation is paramount in any art and it is fed by the depths of both dark and light. It can be so different from who you portray yourself to be in normal society…it can even have the power to set you free in such a constricting world. We idolize people who excel in their creative spaces because it is the real expression of who they are that we see and recognize. Its as if someone holds a mirror to our face and only in that moment do we allow for rules to be bent…to defy gravity in sport…manners in songs…morality in art.
In the bosom of where your dark knight hides, is where your truth lies. He will reveal to you where healing is deeply required and it is where self expression dances with the wind and plays with the kings.
Maggie's diary 