I’m inspired to write today. This blog is really my home. Even if no one reads, it is ok because writing on it already gives so much back to me. I can just be a creator who expresses and creates just because… I’m a creator. It’s a fulfillment of who I truly am at my core. It’s a place I come back to remind myself why I write in the first place when I get lost in the commercial aspect of turning a passion into a career. I have been pushing my book First Thirty since last year and have hardly been able to write on this platform as much as I would like to. I don’t have a title for this post yet as I write. I usually have a direction of where I want to go before I write each post. Today I don’t. Love brings me here. Love for you who reads, love for my craft as well. Love for how I feel when I write from my heart. I’m not sure where this post will lead me today. I will just let my thoughts unfold. Join me please as I open my heart up and allow myself to be vulnerable and honest with you .
I’m listening to a Sunday radio show on Mixcloud by DJ Eskay and he plays the kind of music that strums at my heart strings. The way I feel while listening to this kind of music is similar to the way I feel when I write with no reward expected in mind. Life seems to offer very few opportunities as we grow older that remind us of all the day dreams we had growing up. I don’t even remember the last time I day dreamed. Imagination diminishes the older you get it seems. Imagination becomes a state for those who have not yet been heart broken by life enough times. It’s a place where anything is still possible. Where your greatest crush can tell you they like you back and where the most beautiful love stories reside. It’s also a place where you can be who you want to be without restrictions, failure, disappointment or rules. I have the heart of a day dreamer, in a world that kills all magic daily. I loved day dreaming growing up and my kind of day dreams had no restrictions to what was possible for me. And now… I’m lost in this world of the dead, where day dreamers are weird, unreasonable and woo woo. We do live like we are dead.
I’m amazed at how much amazing phenomenon is in the world in all aspects, yet it seems we have veils covering the magical potential this temporary place holds for us. Maybe it is the way its supposed to be. We live like zombies in the hopes to find life while we live. Maybe life comes in moments. In those short special moments that make us feel alive. Like the moment we reach a mountain top… the moment we reach climax in love making… that moment we achieve a life time award or achievement… that moment in which we feel so very alive… But it’s only a moment. If only we can carry the view of the mountain top as we climb down or as we face another mountain… If only we could carry the climax for eternity as we find monotony, boredom or heartbreak in the same relationship… If we could carry that one “best climax” in our pockets to remind us how good it was… how good it can be. If only we could. But we quickly forget as life shows itself to us in fleeting passing moments. The moments we then chase and crave for their highs, while we are miserable in between. We all have vices we search for inorder to feel alive. They say all human beings have little gods that they chase like prestige or fame, money, power etc. And iv realized once we get to grasp any of these little gods, we realize we are still empty. There is no lonelier person in the world than the famous person. There is no poorer person than a rich person. Real people become less, you become a commodity to those around you, you stop mattering as a person and what you have is now what they are after and you feel it. You become the one others are striving to be but less and less people can relate to. So what is this all for? It all seems in vain, as we chase our vices. And at some point, no matter how much we have achieved, it’s all meaningless.
The older I get, the more I crave for people who fill me up. I crave real conversations, real connection… maybe that’s why I crave this blog when I feel disconnected. It’s a place where I can be real and write about the stuff most people wouldn’t care to talk about. So the people who do come to read these posts, I know crave the same as I do. They are family to me. So I guess this post will serve to remind you of the day dreamer in you, of the moments you felt alive and to ask you, why you do it all? What purpose do your passions have? Let’s hold on to those moments a little longer and when they come let’s truly savour them. May our kisses be deep delicious french kisses… May our hugs feel warmer, may they be tighter and may they last longer… May our passions truly leave us more passionate and may our mountain tops become our plains. May life be magical and our day dreams unfold as we live each day.
I would not be a writer without a reader. I love and appreciate you all so much ❤️
Maggie's diary 